The Wrong Impression
by alextfish
Summary: A quick little The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi oneshot for you all. The twist is, it has three scenes, but in true Haruhi style, they're not in chronological order!


A quick little _The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi _oneoff for you all. Three scenes: chronological order is 1, 2, 3... but naturally, since this is inspired by _The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi_, it's not in that order here! It's designed to be read in the order 3, 2, 1.

Disclaimer: Quite obviously, I'm not anything to do with _The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi_ except a big fan.

* * *

**-- Scene 3 --**

"Those stupid people! How could they fail to see our greatness!"

Haruhi's face was a mask of thunder as she pounded the restaurant's table with her fist.

Asahina-san laughed nervously and said, "Don't worry, Suzumiya-san... I'm sure we can find another way to have fun..."

"But they didn't even have any kind of explanation! All they could say was, 'Sorry, you're not what we're looking for'. What's wrong with them!"

Sitting to one side of Haruhi on the table, I watched her uneasily, hoping for the evening to end quickly. My disquiet was principally because Itsuki, sitting on the same long seat on the other side of Haruhi, was frantically gesturing at me. Nagato and Asahina-san, sitting on the other side of the table from us three, were trying to ensure Haruhi didn't notice Itsuki's gesticulations.

I didn't know what he had in mind, but I probably wanted to try to avert Haruhi's wrath if possible. That's the problem, of course - "if possible". How do you calm Suzumiya Haruhi if she's been offended?

Maybe a change of subject could be a good idea. "So are we going out on the usual patrol tomorrow?" I said, trying to inject a note of lightness into my voice.

Haruhi just turned towards me and glared. My resolve wilted. "Don't you try to change the subject on me, Kyon! We need to find a way to make them recognise our potential, or we'll never be able to get the exposure we need!"

"Come on, we'll be fine," I said hastily. "We don't need to do anything like --"

"Kyon!" She was glaring straight at me - truly a disconcerting experience when she was sitting right next to me. Itsuki's frantic waving behind her stepped up. Asahina-san was looking very worried also.

Come on, guys! What do you expect me to do, sitting here in a family restaurant on an evening when there's so many people around?

I was out of ideas. And then as I looking at her face looking straight back at me, something popped into my head.

So I subtly reached out with my hand, under the table where nobody could see, and touched her fingers with mine.

Her expression transitioned quickly from rage to... Surprise. A hint of puzzlement. And possibly a little excitement?

Or perhaps I imagined that last. But she did twine her fingertips around mine.

Anyway, it was enough of a distraction to let me add, "We'll be fine, Haruhi. Forget about those silly people. There's lots more fun things we can do."

Looking into my eyes, she replied, "...If that's alright with you... then okay." The enthusiasm returned to her smile as she added, "You're right, there's lots more fun to be had yet!"

That seemed to be one crisis averted. Although just to be sure, I didn't take my hand away for a few minutes. Just to be sure that her rage didn't return.

Don't read any more into it than that.

* * *

**-- Scene 2 --**

Two men sitting in the pub were wearing full business suits with jacket and tie. One of them turned to the other and said, "So what about this group?"

"They've got the sound. No doubt about that."

The acoustic guitar played a screamingly fast sequence of riffs and chords as if to punctuate his point.

The first man raised an eyebrow and said, "You sound unconvinced?"

"...There's more to a hit rock group than the sound."

"True. But don't you think this lead singer's got the personality to make it?"

The only person clearly visible in the dim pub lighting, the girl at the front of the stage breathlessly sang into the mic as the song moved into the bridge, her voice full of energy and perfectly in tune.

"...I'm sure she has. But..."

The first man took on a more persuasive tone. "Look, I'm sure we could ditch some of the unnecessary members of the group. This kind of passion, guts, is what we're looking for!"

The bassline pounded. The drummer stepped up the rhythm for the final chorus.

"But we need someone with at least some sense or discernment. We're not recruiting dappy idols, you know - we're after a rock group. I can't see the execs being happy we signed up anyone who'd be willing to dress in a costume like that."

The first man frowned. "I suppose you're right. Those costumes are really pretty silly."

Standing at the bar behind them, watching the stage, I slowly exhaled a long breath of relief. I knew Haruhi would be disappointed, but I can't say I was. I looked up and caught her eye for a moment as she finished off the song with her characteristic enthusiasm,

"Futari ni God bless..."

* * *

**-- Scene 1 --**

"BIG NEWS, EVERYBODY! We're going to become famous by releasing a Number 1 single!"

A normal day in the clubroom was shattered by Haruhi crying those words as she threw open the door. Her face had that enthusiastic grin that made me shudder inside.

I couldn't help myself. I had to ask. "Why do you think we'll be able to even record a single, let alone get it released and sell enough to go to number 1?"

Undaunted, she waved a music magazine in the air. "This magazine is all about how unknown bands are becoming famous! More scouts from record companies are visiting gigs in pubs and things, looking for the new talent! So obviously we can be that new talent!"

She certainly seems to have lost the self-consciousness she felt when she stood on stage with ENOZ at the school festival.

"I've already spoken to ENOZ. I told them we'd find them a gig if we could join them, and they're happy with that arrangement."

Of course they would be - that's not the problem! "Where's this gig going to come from?"

Naturally, I'd regret asking that. "Isn't it obvious, Kyon? You're going to arrange it!"

So she made me look around on the internet to find where the scouts were likely to be. Why me? This isn't the kind of thing I would choose to spend my time doing. But somehow, when Suzumiya Haruhi asks, you have to do what she says...

In the end, I managed to track down a pub where record company scouts had been known to be seen. I called the pub... and it turned out they'd had a band cancel who had been booked to play next Saturday afternoon. With deep misgivings, I told them we'd play. "We", as in "ENOZ and the SOS-dan". It sounds just as ridiculous in a band name as in a club name.

Rehearsals made us all cringe. That is, except Haruhi, naturally. Nagato showed off again her completely artificial skill on lead guitar... ENOZ's guitarist was somewhat intimidated, but happily agreed to play second guitar to Nagato. Asahina-san and the original ENOZ singer were backing vocals to Haruhi's lead vocals. As for Itsuki, I don't know what was more absurd - his suggestion that he could add a trumpet to the guitar-driven band, or the way he turned out to play it really well.

Thankfully, I didn't end up on stage. Given that Haruhi was already making me do all the managing and organisation, I persuaded her that she didn't want to wear me out by making me do something crazy like bongo drums or backing dance. I really wouldn't have put it past her otherwise.

But what made me shiver the most was the way that two days before the gig, Nagato took me aside at the end of the rehearsal and said this:

"You should ensure that the recording studio do not actually choose Suzumiya Haruhi's group. It would not be advisable to attract that much attention."

I may have lost my cool somewhat as I replied, "S-So there are really going to be scouts there?"

"Suzumiya Haruhi will ensure that there are. And the music will impress them. You should take steps to ensure that despite this, they will be reluctant to sign up the band."

"Do you have any suggestions how I could do this!"

Nagato's face was completely straight as she replied, "I recommend that you have Suzumiya Haruhi and the rest of us dress in several more copies of Asahina Mikuru's frog costume."

With a deep sigh, I rubbed my brow and said, "I'll get right on it."


End file.
